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Anyone can become enraged once in a while. But if you feel rage boiling within almost constantly, or rage erupts from you frequently, you may have an organic illness.
On the other hand, you might have suffered some terrible injustice as a child.
One major, but largely ignored, category of such abuse is that of boys emotionally, physically, or sexually damaged by women.
This abuse is not only widespread but may be at the root of much subsequent abuse of women by men.
A little boy abused by a woman suffers in similar ways to a little girl abused by a man.
In recent times it has become acceptable for women to speak out about the abuse they suffered as children; most men feel no such permission is given to them about the abuse they suffered as little boys at the hands of women. These men are ashamed, and enraged.
They are enraged because society accepts that men can be angry but there is less acceptance for the male victims' feelings of hurt, fear, inadequacy, guilt, embarrassment, and especially weakness and vulnerability.
A male victim smothers these emotions with anger. In this way, he preserves his masculine image. But the cost is enormous.
A man unaware of the deep sources of his anger will, at the least, have troubled relationships with women; at the worst, he may rape and mutilate.
A male victim of childhood sexual abuse by women displays the following behavior as an adult:
>> Distrust of women.
>> Fear of intimacy.
>> No separate identity.
>> Readily feels guilt.
>> Hard time to accept compliments.
>> Holds back emotions.
>> Protects abuser(s).
>> Sexual difficulties.
>> Seeks abuser's approval.
>> Constantly apologises.
>> Fearful.
>> Eager to care for others.
>> Joyless. (Adapted from Blanchard, 1987*)
The lousy feelings often erupt as rage. Ronald sought professional help to change his vicious behavior toward his wife, Helen.
Ronald would arrive home disgruntled after a disappointing day (every day was disappointing) in the architectural office where he worked, and an hour's drive to the suburb.
Before long, he would be kicking Helen. There was always some pretext for the kicks. (Helen did not have supper ready, or she was on the phone, or she wore a dress he hated...). Ronald never used his fists. Always his legs. He despaired of his uncontrollable rage because he believed that “Helen was the best thing that had ever happened to me.”
As Ronald talked more about his life, his hostility to almost everyone became evident. He was jealous of his brothers, sneered at their choices of wives, hated his job where he felt put upon, especially by female colleagues.
When Ronald spoke about his mother, he whined. Long stories of how she favored one or other of his brothers, how he cringed in her presence, how he avoided visits to her house yet was jealous of her contacts with his siblings. Ronald was convinced his mother preferred one of his nephews, adding bitterly, “Though my son was the first grandchild.”
Hypnotherapy Heals the Hurt and the Rage
Within the comfort of hypnosis Ronald was able to connect his present-day woes with unpleasant incidents in his childhood.
This was accomplished with what hypnotherapists call an “affect link.” You allow yourself to feel a particular emotion, such as grief. As you continue to experience the feeling, the hypnotherapist asks you to recall an earlier time when you felt the same way. Ronald's confused mix of bitterness, rage and sense of abandonment, swiftly drew up a memory of his mother:
“I'm six years old. Mummy keeps telling me I'm her favorite. She tells me to come into her bed. It's warm there. I fall asleep, snuggled beside her. I wake up. She's moving my leg up and down over this hairy place between her legs. She's breathing funny. I'm scared. [Sobs]. She opens her eyes a little and tells me it's okay. My knee is wet. I try to pull away but she holds onto me, tells me to be a good boy, do this for Mummy. She seems out of breath. I'm scared. Then she shakes and cries out. I'm even more scared and I feel bad, like something's really wrong. I ask Mummy if she's all right. She turns to me with a big smile, hugs me and says I'm her little man and everything is fine. [More sobs, reddening of face].
“But everything is not fine. I don't understand. Mummy tells me this will be our special secret. She seems happy. And she likes me best. So I keep quiet. And whenever she asks me I let her use my leg to rub her where she wants. [Later Ronald described other sexual activity his mother initiated]. I begin to like it, too. When I get old enough to have an erection, Mummy plays with my penis. I really like that. But at the same time it feels kind of weird. This stuff went on till I was eleven. I found out at school what sex was supposed to be, and how bad it was what Mummy and me had been doing. I felt sick.”
With psychotherapy while he relaxed in hypnosis, Ronald made some progress toward a healthier life, and control of his rage.
Unfortunately, his wife sabotaged the treatment. Ronald, like many sexually abused victims, had (unconsciously) sought out a woman who would continue the abuse he had suffered as a child.
Helen had made no secret of her broad sexual experience prior to meeting Ronald; indeed, she was proud of it. But her knowledge of the carnal world and his relative innocence (sex with only one woman: his mother) repeated the power pattern Ronald had suffered as a boy.
When Helen saw that Ronald was learning to control his rage, to lessen his hostile attitude and to relax, she counterattacked. Helen had married Ronald because (unconsciously) she wanted a man she could dominate and despise. His therapy threatened to upset the delicate dance of danger they had created.
Ronald was swiftly reduced to a sniveling, angry puppet when Helen sneered at his progress and repeatedly reminded him of what a Mummy's boy he had been.
A final blow bounced Ronald out of therapy: Helen telephoned the therapist, discussed Ronald's history, and insisted the therapist not mention her call to Ronald. The following week Helen casually mentioned to Ronald something the therapist had said to her. Ronald felt betrayed [he was] and never returned to therapy.
You may be doing very well with hypnotherapy when a friend or relative sabotages your progress. This is not usually as dramatic or underhanded as Helen's behavior. The disruption comes in the form of doubt. Your friend may question the effectiveness of hypnosis, and cite the many hypnosis myths that still pollute our minds.
Once doubt is planted, hypnosis ends. Doubt and fear keep us from relaxation. And relaxation is the route into hypnotherapy.
Dennis, like Ronald, suffered fits of rage. Unlike Ronald, Dennis took these fits out on himself. He would tremble, and shake, and sweat and fear he was about to pass out. Dennis knew his ambition to become a police officer would never be realized unless he got over these fits. Like Ronald, he had troubled relationships with women.
Unlike Ronald, Dennis had slept with dozens of women. All his longer-term relationships collapsed over an aspect of jealousy, his or hers. Didn't matter. Dennis could not trust a woman.
Dennis deliberately sought out a male psychotherapist who sometimes used hypnosis. But so scared was Dennis of going into hypnosis, that he spent several sessions in traditional psychotherapy before he had plucked up enough courage to try hypnosis.
Mothers Are Not The Only Women Who Abuse Little Boys
As far as Dennis knew, he had not been molested by his mother. Actually, he was not even sure who his biological mother was. He had been born into a large, extended criminal family. He had lived in seven different homes by the time he was five. All but one were homes of his aunts, cousins or siblings. He got used to calling each aunt in turn “mother.” The woman listed on his birth certificate showed no more, and no less, maternal interest in Dennis than did any of her sisters who raised him.
From as far back as he could remember, Dennis had been abused: abandoned, ignored, ill-fed, beaten, locked in a closet.
The therapist helped Dennis sort out the multitude of feelings that swirled within him.
Finally, Dennis said he was ready to try hypnosis. He was still frightened, despite the therapist's explanations about the safety of the process. But it was not hypnosis itself that Dennis feared; it was what might be uncovered.
In one way, he was right to be wary. But what was uncovered, awful as it was, freed Dennis from the last symbolic chains that linked him to his abusive family and their criminal ways.
In hypnosis, Dennis traced his attacks of trembling to some disgusting sexual behavior of one of his aunts when he was about four. What she had done to him and with him amounted to torture. It had been so horrible he had repressed the details for years, though “I knew something had happened; I just didn't know what.”
Now that he knew what lay at the root of his rage and his attacks, Dennis was able to let go of them. He felt forgiveness for his aunt because he knew of her own dreadful background. It was as if to know what she had done liberated Dennis from any lingering loyalty to his criminal relatives (all of whom were involved in drug deals, prostitution, extortion, etc.).
Now Dennis felt fully comfortable with his decision to apply to the local police training college.
*Blanchard, Geral. (1987). Male Victims of Child Sexual Abuse: A Portent of Things to Come, Journal of Independent Social Work, 1-1, 19-27.
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Nitric Oxide (NO) booster supplements have quickly become the hottest selling products on the market. With more and more concern over the long term use and side effects of pro hormones and steroid precursors (not to mention their tenuous legal status), many bodybuilders are looking for alternatives.
In 1998, Doctors Robert F Furchgott, Louis J Ignarro and Ferid Murad won the Nobel Prize for Science when their research proved that Nitric Oxide was "a signalling molecule in the cardiovascular system". Their research proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that elevated levels of NO played a role in numerous bodily functions. Dr Ignarro has even been quoted "Nitric Oxide deficiency can contribute to nearly every major disease of our times". Two of the benefits of NO in the body are the relaxation and dilation (enlargement) of blood vessels and also tissue repair.
Nitric Oxide is produced in the body by the amino acid L-Arginine. The problem however is that the average person only gets enough L-Arginine in their daily diet to cover the basic bodily functions. This is where NO boosters have become popular. These products are based on L-Arginine in the form of Alpha Ketogluterate. This form of L-Arginine is more bio-available so it is utilized more efficiently in the body.
BSN, a leading manufacturer of nutritional supplements developed their product "Nitrix" primarily for the bodybuilding community. After the Nobel Prize winning research, that clearly proved the effects of elevated NO levels, BSN realized that this blood vessel dilation effect could have numerous benefits. The first thing Nitrix users will notice after a week or two is better "pumps" and increased vascularity when working out. "The Pump" is when a muscle that is being worked through heavy weight training becomes engorged with blood and gets bigger and harder. Additionally, Nitrix increases vascularity. Bodybuilders love seeing forearms and biceps that have huge, clearly defined veins bulging.
One of the other benefits that users report with Nitrix is better recovery from their training. Since blood vessels are bigger, nutrients and blood flow are shuttled throughout the body more readily
So are there any downsides to Nitrix? Well, side effects that have been reported are few but some people who take more than the recommended dose of Nitrix have reported stomach upset. It is important to take the dose suggested.
While it's not necessarily a side effect, another downside to Nitrix is the size of the tablets. They are rather large and since you need to take 3 at a time, it can be bothersome to some people.
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Penis enhancement, male enhancement, virility, impotence, endurance, libido, elongate, enlarge, lenthen, empower - these are all now the buzzwords of the male enhancement and "penis enlargement" industry. An industry that has become a multi-million dollar venture in a relatively short period of time. So why the sudden explosion of this once seemingly niche market for aging men who needed a little help? Why all the knockoffs of Viagra? And why all the hundreds of natural and herbal alternatives to Viagra, Cialis, and the like?
That answer can vary in it's complexity and speculation, but it all really boils down to a different way of life in the modern world, the breaking down of sexual taboos hence more talk of male virility and impotence, and the hustle and bustle of modern life literally draining the life and passion out of so many people that they are left looking for answers to dwindling sex drives, perceived inadequacies in penis size, and unsatisfactory sexual performance.
This is especially is true of men, who tend to hold sex very near and dear, and who are biologically programmed to have higher sex drives and socially programmed to desire more sex, more often, and have higher expectations of sexual fulfillment than women. Not to say that some women don't feel the same way, but for the sake of demonstration we will use this generalization.
This is exactly what accounts for the huge male enhancement and penis enhancement market today - both prescription and herbal. So what if you're a guy who doesn't really want to go to the doctor because you don't actually have a problem with erectile disfunction, but you know that you need to add that zing back to your sex life, and possibly some extra size or girth to your penis, or you want to last longer and have more powerful, fulfilling and stress-relieving orgasms?
Well, fortunately for you, you are part of an era known as the herbal explosion age. For almost every pharmaceutical drug, the herbal and nutraceutical industry has come up with some very promising and close imitations and alternatives to prescription medications, without all the man-made chemicals and possibilities of dangerous side effects.
That's not to say that you shouldn't be cautious when selecting a male enhancement or penile enlargement supplement. You still need to read the ingredients, and make sure they are not going to interfere with any existing medications. Also, if you begin noticing you just don't feel right, or there is any type of side effect or reaction to any ingredient, you should stop taking it immediately and request a refund. Most reputable companies will be happy to provide a refund if you are not happy with the results or the product just didn't agree with your chemistry.
So there you have it - you can still have a great sex life, improve your self image and sexual satisfaction, and do it discreetly, naturally and safely. We all need a little help now and then in the bedroom, and these penis enlargement and male enhancement products are looking to be just the right sexual remedy for more and more men (and women!).
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Most men don't truly understand the nature of the Vagina, its mostly a mystery, even to some women. Many complain that men are insensitive to their sexuality, but there is a growing number of women that also seek the fountain of Venus!
The mystery and taboo is partly related to the female reproductive system being harder to access than its male counterpart; this concealment is extended to our culture (in the west) where female bodies are kept much more private than males, the privacy has helped shape how these are perceived as well.
Female Ejaculation is a real procedure, and you need to be willing to literally study yourself, and until relatively recently the medical advice has been "don't play with, look at or do that"; the result is that generations of women have been sexually oppressed by the social mores such that they never experience a sizable part of their innate sexuality.
This is partly due to the western culture of control and concealment as regards to the female form, in addition to the standard social mores concerning female body fluids. This subject, like most areas of female sexuality is looked upon with disdain in terms of "civil society", thus helping to retain this as a taboo.
Women are idolised as static dry and pristine yet sexual creatures, in appearance, and are subject to unwritten laws such as not being permitted to break this illusion by openly performing normal bodily functions such as sweating or producing too much vaginal lubrication.
The first modern description of female ejaculation came from the Netherlands. Here is the information you need to know:
[1] All things being equal, assuming the standard female shape, it should be technically possible for anyone to experience ejaculation. However, every body is unique and geometry can certainly prevent a woman achieving this form of arousal.
[2] The expelled fluid is a sexual mixture from or around the urethra consisting of fluids including a form of urine called uriar, calcium and assorted pheromones, this is a normal bodily function.
[3] women can not actively control release of vaginal fluids during sexual activities, this is normal and cannot be assisted or prevented per say; so both psyche and technique are required.
[4] The possible volume of ejaculate is directly proportional to sexual activities; ie avoiding sex = more material, this is not a medical problem.
Anatomy dictates that positions of intercourse where the man is on top result in penetration to the posterior wall of the vagina, assuming the woman is on her back. This type of position will not provide stimulation of the cervix or the grafenberg-spot because the penis will simply go to the back of the vagina, bypassing the anterior wall which is much more sensitive than the back or posterior walls.
However, positions where the woman is on top or in the case of rectal entry (not recommended without extreme care) or where the man is at an upward angle relative to the woman; penetration will occur such that the anterior wall will be stimulated.
An accepted method of achieving female ejaculation is all in the finger action via clitoral, vaginal, or grafenberg stimulation, note that the clitoral system is also a powerful organ in its own right, with 8000 nerve endings, which extends 10cm down the inner leg!
The lady should be lying down at an angle with her legs open to expose her volva and the labia minora, for best results, her lover should lay at her right (assuming he is right-handed).
After the foreplay, this is essential, whatever is required to get her aroused, the lover must insert two fingers into her vagina, some combination of the middles is quite effective, with his palm facing the pubic bone (up).
The lover must now locate her grafenberg-spot, a slightly raised, spongy bump on the "roof" of the vaginal cave; in most women, it is just behind the clitoris about 2 cm into the vagina, between the back of the pubic bone and the cervix along the course of the urethra.
He should start by manipulating his fingers such that they push up and stroke the anterior wall of the vagina in a "come here" motion, while continuing the foreplay if possable.
This should stimulate the pelvic nerve and the hypergastric plexus, as opposed to the clitoral stimulus which involves only the prudential nerve.
Ideally, concurrent stimulation of both the cervix and grafenberg-spot is required, this involves the pelvic, hypergastric and the sensory vaguess nerve which creates more of a total body impression, and it is this type of pressure that releases a warm flow of vaginal liquid.
Note that all main stream materiels designed to stimulate sexual desire including the 'Squirting Girls' movies and pictures are contrived and airbrushed, these are the last places to see natural reproductive processes!
Sex is hardly ever executed as portrayed in the movies, its often dirty, noisy, smelly, oozy, and thinking about it can significantly impact sexual pleasure.
The good news is that as a rule, our children are becoming sexually aware at younger ages then in the past, which is in part due to the schools so called "sex education" which serves only to demystify sex.
The result is initially just better levels of education, the natural consequence of which is more experimentation, earlier in life when things are more supple and ultimately better use of the equipment.
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As you begin to get older, many men begin to wonder about their prostate health. Prostate health is all over the news and media, and you may even know someone that has been diagnosed with prostate cancer over the past few years. If you are worried about your prostate health, or want to find out ways to help protect it, you have come to the right place. We will go over what this important gland does, and discuss the different options that you have in protecting your prostate health.
First, you must understand what the prostate actually is. It is a sexual gland, about the size of a walnut that is located around the base of the bladder and urethra. It essentially, hugs the tube that carries urine out of your body. This partially muscular, partially glandular organ produces a slightly alkaline substance that is present in semen.
It is important to understand that there are many problems with prostate health that aren’t life threatening. So if you feel that you may have a problem with your prostate, usually shown by a difficulty to urinate, it is important that you seek medical advice. Prostate disease is a condition that can vary from individual to individual. Some simply have an infection that can be treated with medication; others have an inflammation of the prostate tissue, while others simply have an enlargement of the prostate gland. While all of these many indicate cancer at a latter point, they don’t necessarily mean cancer right off the bat.
Getting a diagnosis is the first step to improving your prostate health. Your doctor may perform one or more of the following tests to access the situation. Most of them are painless or may only be uncomfortable. Discuss your options with your doctor if you have a low threshold for pain.
• DRE (digital rectal examination). The physician will fell the prostate manually to look for enlargements and problems.
• PSA (prostate-specific antigen) testing. Your doctor will do a simple blood test to determine your level of PSA. Small amounts are normal, but large amounts could indicate a problem.
• TRUS (transrectal ultrasound). This test uses wave echoes to create an image of the prostate.
• Cystoscopy- where the doctor looks through the urethra with a thin, lighted tube.
• Biopsy- a small tissue sample is collected from the area and studied.
The key to preserving your prostate health is go get proper treatment early on. Many men are ashamed to seek treatment, which can ultimately lead to further complications. Prostate disease and cancer are easily treated as long as you get diagnosed early on. At the first sign of pain or discomfort contact your doctor immediately. Men over the age of 50 should get their prostate checked out at least once a year. Find a doctor that you are comfortable with, and make sure to ask questions. Many patients choose to do research online before they visit a doctor, which will help you ask the right questions during your visit.
