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Alan Pease, author of a book titled "Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps", believes that women are spatially-challenged compared to men. The British firm, Admiral Insurance, conducted a study of half a million claims. They found that "women were almost twice as likely as men to have a collision in a car park, 23 percent more likely to hit a stationary car, and 15 percent more likely to reverse into another vehicle" (Reuters). Yet gender "differences" are often the outcomes of bad scholarship. Consider Admiral insurance's data. As Britain's Automobile Association (AA) correctly pointed out - women drivers tend to make more short journeys around towns and shopping centers and these involve frequent parking. Hence their ubiquity in certain kinds of claims. Regarding women's alleged spatial deficiency, in Britain, girls have been outperforming boys in scholastic aptitude tests - including geometry and maths - since 1988. On the other wing of the divide, Anthony Clare, a British psychiatrist and author of "On Men" wrote: "At the beginning of the 21st century it is difficult to avoid the conclusion that men are in serious trouble. Throughout the world, developed and developing, antisocial behavior is essentially male. Violence, sexual abuse of children, illicit drug use, alcohol misuse, gambling, all are overwhelmingly male activities. The courts and prisons bulge with men. When it comes to aggression, delinquent behavior, risk taking and social mayhem, men win gold." Men also mature later, die earlier, are more susceptible to infections and most types of cancer, are more likely to be dyslexic, to suffer from a host of mental health disorders, such as Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), and to commit suicide. In her book, "Stiffed: The Betrayal of the American Man", Susan Faludi describes a crisis of masculinity following the breakdown of manhood models and work and family structures in the last five decades. In the film "Boys don't Cry", a teenage girl binds her breasts and acts the male in a caricatural relish of stereotypes of virility. Being a man is merely a state of mind, the movie implies. But what does it really mean to be a "male" or a "female"? Are gender identity and sexual preferences genetically determined? Can they be reduced to one's sex? Or are they amalgams of biological, social, and psychological factors in constant interaction? Are they immutable lifelong features or dynamically evolving frames of self-reference? Certain traits attributed to one's sex are surely better accounted for by cultural factors, the process of socialization, gender roles, and what George Devereux called "ethnopsychiatry" in "Basic Problems of Ethnopsychiatry" (University of Chicago Press, 1980). He suggested to divide the unconscious into the id (the part that was always instinctual and unconscious) and the "ethnic unconscious" (repressed material that was once conscious). The latter is mostly molded by prevailing cultural mores and includes all our defense mechanisms and most of the superego. So, how can we tell whether our sexual role is mostly in our blood or in our brains? The scrutiny of borderline cases of human sexuality - notably the transgendered or intersexed - can yield clues as to the distribution and relative weights of biological, social, and psychological determinants of gender identity formation. The results of a study conducted by Uwe Hartmann, Hinnerk Becker, and Claudia Rueffer-Hesse in 1997 and titled "Self and Gender: Narcissistic Pathology and Personality Factors in Gender Dysphoric Patients", published in the "International Journal of Transgenderism", "indicate significant psychopathological aspects and narcissistic dysregulation in a substantial proportion of patients." Are these "psychopathological aspects" merely reactions to underlying physiological realities and changes? Could social ostracism and labeling have induced them in the "patients"? The authors conclude: "The cumulative evidence of our study ... is consistent with the view that gender dysphoria is a disorder of the sense of self as has been proposed by Beitel (1985) or Pfäfflin (1993). The central problem in our patients is about identity and the self in general and the transsexual wish seems to be an attempt at reassuring and stabilizing the self-coherence which in turn can lead to a further destabilization if the self is already too fragile. In this view the body is instrumentalized to create a sense of identity and the splitting symbolized in the hiatus between the rejected body-self and other parts of the self is more between good and bad objects than between masculine and feminine." Freud, Kraft-Ebbing, and Fliess suggested that we are all bisexual to a certain degree. As early as 1910, Dr. Magnus Hirschfeld argued, in Berlin, that absolute genders are "abstractions, invented extremes". The consensus today is that one's sexuality is, mostly, a psychological construct which reflects gender role orientation. Joanne Meyerowitz, a professor of history at Indiana University and the editor of The Journal of American History observes, in her recently published tome, "How Sex Changed: A History of Transsexuality in the United States", that the very meaning of masculinity and femininity is in constant flux. Transgender activists, says Meyerowitz, insist that gender and sexuality represent "distinct analytical categories". The New York Times wrote in its review of the book: "Some male-to-female transsexuals have sex with men and call themselves homosexuals. Some female-to-male transsexuals have sex with women and call themselves lesbians. Some transsexuals call themselves asexual." So, it is all in the mind, you see. This would be taking it too far. A large body of scientific evidence points to the genetic and biological underpinnings of sexual behavior and preferences. The German science magazine, "Geo", reported recently that the males of the fruit fly "drosophila melanogaster" switched from heterosexuality to homosexuality as the temperature in the lab was increased from 19 to 30 degrees Celsius. They reverted to chasing females as it was lowered. The brain structures of homosexual sheep are different to those of straight sheep, a study conducted recently by the Oregon Health & Science University and the U.S. Department of Agriculture Sheep Experiment Station in Dubois, Idaho, revealed. Similar differences were found between gay men and straight ones in 1995 in Holland and elsewhere. The preoptic area of the hypothalamus was larger in heterosexual men than in both homosexual men and straight women. According an article, titled "When Sexual Development Goes Awry", by Suzanne Miller, published in the September 2000 issue of the "World and I", various medical conditions give rise to sexual ambiguity. Congenital adrenal hyperplasia (CAH), involving excessive androgen production by the adrenal cortex, results in mixed genitalia. A person with the complete androgen insensitivity syndrome (AIS) has a vagina, external female genitalia and functioning, androgen-producing, testes - but no uterus or fallopian tubes. People with the rare 5-alpha reductase deficiency syndrome are born with ambiguous genitalia. They appear at first to be girls. At puberty, such a person develops testicles and his clitoris swells and becomes a penis. Hermaphrodites possess both ovaries and testicles (both, in most cases, rather undeveloped). Sometimes the ovaries and testicles are combined into a chimera called ovotestis. Most of these individuals have the chromosomal composition of a woman together with traces of the Y, male, chromosome. All hermaphrodites have a sizable penis, though rarely generate sperm. Some hermaphrodites develop breasts during puberty and menstruate. Very few even get pregnant and give birth. Anne Fausto-Sterling, a developmental geneticist, professor of medical science at Brown University, and author of "Sexing the Body", postulated, in 1993, a continuum of 5 sexes to supplant the current dimorphism: males, merms (male pseudohermaphrodites), herms (true hermaphrodites), ferms (female pseudohermaphrodites), and females. Intersexuality (hermpahroditism) is a natural human state. We are all conceived with the potential to develop into either sex. The embryonic developmental default is female. A series of triggers during the first weeks of pregnancy places the fetus on the path to maleness. In rare cases, some women have a male's genetic makeup (XY chromosomes) and vice versa. But, in the vast majority of cases, one of the sexes is clearly selected. Relics of the stifled sex remain, though. Women have the clitoris as a kind of symbolic penis. Men have breasts (mammary glands) and nipples. The Encyclopedia Britannica 2003 edition describes the formation of ovaries and testes thus: "In the young embryo a pair of gonads develop that are indifferent or neutral, showing no indication whether they are destined to develop into testes or ovaries. There are also two different duct systems, one of which can develop into the female system of oviducts and related apparatus and the other into the male sperm duct system. As development of the embryo proceeds, either the male or the female reproductive tissue differentiates in the originally neutral gonad of the mammal." Yet, sexual preferences, genitalia and even secondary sex characteristics, such as facial and pubic hair are first order phenomena. Can genetics and biology account for male and female behavior patterns and social interactions ("gender identity")? Can the multi-tiered complexity and richness of human masculinity and femininity arise from simpler, deterministic, building blocks? Sociobiologists would have us think so. For instance: the fact that we are mammals is astonishingly often overlooked. Most mammalian families are composed of mother and offspring. Males are peripatetic absentees. Arguably, high rates of divorce and birth out of wedlock coupled with rising promiscuity merely reinstate this natural "default mode", observes Lionel Tiger, a professor of anthropology at Rutgers University in New Jersey. That three quarters of all divorces are initiated by women tends to support this view. Furthermore, gender identity is determined during gestation, claim some scholars. Milton Diamond of the University of Hawaii and Dr. Keith Sigmundson, a practicing psychiatrist, studied the much-celebrated John/Joan case. An accidentally castrated normal male was surgically modified to look female, and raised as a girl but to no avail. He reverted to being a male at puberty. His gender identity seems to have been inborn (assuming he was not subjected to conflicting cues from his human environment). The case is extensively described in John Colapinto's tome "As Nature Made Him: The Boy Who Was Raised as a Girl". HealthScoutNews cited a study published in the November 2002 issue of "Child Development". The researchers, from City University of London, found that the level of maternal testosterone during pregnancy affects the behavior of neonatal girls and renders it more masculine. "High testosterone" girls "enjoy activities typically considered male behavior, like playing with trucks or guns". Boys' behavior remains unaltered, according to the study. Yet, other scholars, like John Money, insist that newborns are a "blank slate" as far as their gender identity is concerned. This is also the prevailing view. Gender and sex-role identities, we are taught, are fully formed in a process of socialization which ends by the third year of life. The Encyclopedia Britannica 2003 edition sums it up thus: "Like an individual's concept of his or her sex role, gender identity develops by means of parental example, social reinforcement, and language. Parents teach sex-appropriate behavior to their children from an early age, and this behavior is reinforced as the child grows older and enters a wider social world. As the child acquires language, he also learns very early the distinction between "he" and "she" and understands which pertains to him- or herself." So, which is it - nature or nurture? There is no disputing the fact that our sexual physiology and, in all probability, our sexual preferences are determined in the womb. Men and women are different - physiologically and, as a result, also psychologically. Society, through its agents - foremost amongst which are family, peers, and teachers - represses or encourages these genetic propensities. It does so by propagating "gender roles" - gender-specific lists of alleged traits, permissible behavior patterns, and prescriptive morals and norms. Our "gender identity" or "sex role" is shorthand for the way we make use of our natural genotypic-phenotypic endowments in conformity with social-cultural "gender roles". Inevitably as the composition and bias of these lists change, so does the meaning of being "male" or "female". Gender roles are constantly redefined by tectonic shifts in the definition and functioning of basic social units, such as the nuclear family and the workplace. The cross-fertilization of gender-related cultural memes renders "masculinity" and "femininity" fluid concepts. One's sex equals one's bodily equipment, an objective, finite, and, usually, immutable inventory. But our endowments can be put to many uses, in different cognitive and affective contexts, and subject to varying exegetic frameworks. As opposed to "sex" - "gender" is, therefore, a socio-cultural narrative. Both heterosexual and homosexual men ejaculate. Both straight and lesbian women climax. What distinguishes them from each other are subjective introjects of socio-cultural conventions, not objective, immutable "facts". In "The New Gender Wars", published in the November/December 2000 issue of "Psychology Today", Sarah Blustain sums up the "bio-social" model proposed by Mice Eagly, a professor of psychology at Northwestern University and a former student of his, Wendy Wood, now a professor at the Texas A&M University: "Like (the evolutionary psychologists), Eagly and Wood reject social constructionist notions that all gender differences are created by culture. But to the question of where they come from, they answer differently: not our genes but our roles in society. This narrative focuses on how societies respond to the basic biological differences - men's strength and women's reproductive capabilities - and how they encourage men and women to follow certain patterns. 'If you're spending a lot of time nursing your kid', explains Wood, 'then you don't have the opportunity to devote large amounts of time to developing specialized skills and engaging tasks outside of the home'. And, adds Eagly, 'if women are charged with caring for infants, what happens is that women are more nurturing. Societies have to make the adult system work [so] socialization of girls is arranged to give them experience in nurturing'. According to this interpretation, as the environment changes, so will the range and texture of gender differences. At a time in Western countries when female reproduction is extremely low, nursing is totally optional, childcare alternatives are many, and mechanization lessens the importance of male size and strength, women are no longer restricted as much by their smaller size and by child-bearing. That means, argue Eagly and Wood, that role structures for men and women will change and, not surprisingly, the way we socialize people in these new roles will change too. (Indeed, says Wood, 'sex differences seem to be reduced in societies where men and women have similar status,' she says. If you're looking to live in more gender-neutral environment, try Scandinavia.)" buy penis enlargement pills herbal penis enlargment penile enlargement program com enlargement penis penis pump natural penis enlarement technique penile enlargment pills penile enlargement photo vigrx penis enlagement pill

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Tantra is a spiritual tradition that originated in India some 4,000 years ago. It is a way of life that celebrates and strives for the union of body, mind, heart and soul. Tantra is a form of yoga. Yoga means union. The ultimate purpose of Tantra is the union of lovers, and ultimately union with the Divine. In the Tantric tradition, sexuality and spirituality are joined. Lovers actually invite God into their bed! Many cultures have a variation of this challenging and delightful practice, the Taoists in China and the Cheyenne in North America. There are differences in these practices, but all forms of sacred sexuality share the intentional cultivation and use of sexual energy for spiritual growth, healing, creativity and enhanced pleasure. The practices of Tantra were first introduced to the west in the 1800s, but a Tantric revival in the ashrams of India during the late 1960s has led to a gradual popularization of these practices in Europe and North America. Recent testimonials by celebrity musicians and movie stars like Sting and Woody Harrelson have promoted it and Tantra is becoming the sexual learning of choice for those who want to have it all: a passionate sex life, a healthy body, and spiritual growth. Tantric lovemaking involves breathing exercises, muscle contraction exercises, sound, visualization, affirmations, creating a sacred loving space and other ceremonial practices, meditation, sensual massage, and sexual play. In order to build a high sexual energy charge and to move into ecstatic states of divine connection Tantric lovers extend lovemaking over several hours, experiencing extraordinary levels of pleasure along the way. Part of the delight of Tantra is that you can continue to learn and advance throughout years of practice; it is never-ending in its potential for growth. At the same time, it is a practice that yields immediate results. You can experience a difference in your lovemaking right now if you follow these nine simple steps. Tantric Loving Step by Step 1. Intention Regular lovemaking has a goal, orgasm. If you both come at the same instant, many believe this is as good as it gets. However, this approach often results in a great deal of frustration and performance anxiety. With Tantric sacred loving there is no goal, but there is a purpose, union. Your intention is to merge with your lover in all aspects, body, mind, heart and soul, not just body. You can help this along by looking at your lover differently, by seeing your partner as a god or goddess, as a living expression of the divine. Look for the glory, the beauty and the wonder in your playmate and in yourself and let that shine. 2. Creating a Sacred Loving Space Set the mood; transform any ordinary space, bedroom, living room, etc., into a sacred space. It takes only a few minutes and costs little or nothing. The important thing is your intention, not the specific items you use. First, clean the room; vacuum, dust, and put away any clutter lying about. In the evening dim the lights and use lots of candles. Bring in plants or fresh cut flowers. A bowl of fruit is very sensual. You may wish to have a bottle of wine to share. Bring special objects that have emotional importance for into the room. Make up a lover's bed using your finest clean linens (silk is exquisite) and have lots of pillows handy. When you have finished creating the space, take a few moments to purify it energetically. That means consciously sending away negative or fearful thoughts and feelings, and inviting in those that are joyous, passionate and safe. Create your own rituals with sweet grass, incense, and musical instruments. 3. The Lover's Purifying Bath Cleanse each other in preparation for your joyous union. Wash away the dirt and cares of the world. A hot bath with essential oils and bath salts is perfect, especially if you can both fit into the tub at the same time. A shower is the next best thing, but perfectly acceptable. The essential thing is to be squeaky clean. After all you will be eating off that skin! Make the bath a slow, luxurious affair giving complete attention to your lover. Wash and dry each other with playful abandon. Men shave or trim facial hair and apply scent. Women apply their best perfumes and lotions. Sensually prepare your bodies for the delights ahead. 4. Honor, Respect and Permission Trust, surrender and opening your heart are essential if you want to reach the heights of bliss. It is not just technique that will get you there. You must join together as loving equals on the sexual journey. Men, think of the yoni (vagina) as a potential opening, don’t ever take your lady for granted! Speak softly how much you adore, love and respect her as you gently blow on her ears and nibble on her ear lobes. Let her know that you think of her constantly and how strong your desire is to make love with (not to) her. Also, let her know that you invite her to awaken sexually and to express her sexuality fully. Let her know that you are NOT caught in that tired old cultural conditioning that still insists "good girls" do not enjoy sex, the Madonna/Whore split. Make her believe you when you tell her that you know she can be all she wants to be: a successful career woman, a respectful daughter, a faithful wife, a caring mother, a passionate lover and a sincere spiritual seeker all at the same time. Tell her how beautiful she is, how wonderful she smells, and all the things you appreciate most about her. Finally, ask permission to be her passionate Tantric lover. Ladies, let your man know that he is safe! He may act macho and tough, showing little emotion, but inside most men are afraid of emotional intimacy. The tougher a man acts the greater this fear of trusting and surrendering will be. Let him know that you admire his strength, but that it also turns you on when he allows himself to be vulnerable by showing his feelings. Tell him how handsome he is and how talented. Mention all the things you like most about him. Tell him why you love him so deeply. Tell him how much you think about him when he is away, and how you have fantasies about making love with him and touching him when he returns. Make him believe that you really want him sexually. Finally, ask permission to be his passionate Tantric lover. 5. Foreplay Two simple ways to tune into each other are harmonizing your breathing and gazing deeply into each other's eyes. By matching your breathing rhythms and making soulful eye contact you connect emotionally and energetically as well as physically. Begin to explore each other's bodies with wonder, lust and playfulness. Remember, in Tantric sacred loving there is no goal. You are not trying to get somewhere. Each touch is complete in and of itself. Once you master how to work with your sexual energy both lovers will discover they can have orgasms just by touching fingers together, or looking into each other's eyes across a crowded room! So men are not in a hurry to get at the woman's breasts or into her yoni. When touching her body, start at the extremities, fingers and toes, and work in toward the hot spots. Go slowly! Generally men enjoy having their genitals touched at any time, but women usually only enjoy having their breasts and genitals touched after they are already sexually excited from other touching, stimulating conversation, or emotional connection. Make sure the woman is well lubricated before any attempt at intercourse. If possible, help her to have a clitoral orgasm before moving on to intercourse. 6. Intercourse Five to fifteen minutes of lovemaking is usually not satisfying for women. Men can learn to delay ejaculation so that lovemaking can be extended for hours. A man can delay ejaculation for weeks or months at a time, not just during one lovemaking session. A man who masters his ejaculation response can separate orgasm from ejaculation and become a multi-orgasmic-man! Such a man can last long enough in lovemaking so that his female partner will have enough time to also have multiple orgasms. Although Tantric loving lasts several hours, this does not mean you are having active intercourse during that entire time. Intercourse is interspersed with touching, oral play, quietly holding each other, dancing, massage, etc. It is a good idea for a man to allow his erection to subside every 30-45 minutes to exchange the blood supply and recharge his oxygen and hormone levels in the lingam (penis). 7. Moving Your Energy: The Passion Pump Riding the wave of bliss happens when the lovers become totally aroused sexually, maintaining that arousal for a period of time. They build up intense hot sexual energy. For the man, if this energy has nowhere else to go, there will be such great pressure in the prostate, that it will go into involuntary spasm and ejaculation will end the lovemaking. However, with a combination of breathing, relaxation, and muscle contraction exercises both men and women can learn to circulate sexual energy through their own and their lover's body. Ultimately the ego boundaries disappear and the lovers become one in ecstatic union. The muscle contraction exercise is very simple. If you were urinating and stopped the flow of urine in mid-stream you would be contracting exactly the right muscles in exactly the right way. This squeezing and relaxing of muscles around your genitals is called the PC Pump. It's the first and most important exercise in learning to circulate your sexual energy. At the peak of sexual arousal, either during intercourse or manual/oral stimulation stop your normal lovemaking movements and focus on moving the sexual energy that's pulsing in your genitals. Move it up and through your body. Use slow, deep abdominal breathing to keep your body relaxed. Add the PC pumping action and visualize moving energy up your body in a ball of fire or a wave of light or a current of electricity. Through your eyes, your hands, your genitals pass this powerful force on to your lover. At first, this may seem difficult because we are not accustomed to paying attention to our internal energy. With practice, you will be able to recognize and direct it. 8. Afterplay Regular lovemaking usually ends (often abruptly) when the man ejaculates, but Tantric sacred loving often ends while the lovers still have desire. 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It takes a long time for students of English-as-a-second-language to learn to read well. This is not because they have a reading problem: They can read perfectly well in their own language. The problem is just that they don’t know the meaning of enough English words. In other words, they don’t have a big enough vocabulary. It’s not easy to build a vocabulary that allows you to read as well, or almost as well, as people who grew up speaking and reading English. It's quite easy to build the basic vocabulary of 1000-2000 words that you need in order to speak English to other people and understand what they’re saying. You’ll probably pick up that many words, without really trying, during the early stages of your study of English. And if that doesn’t happen, you can always sit down with a good vocabulary list and a dictionary and start memorizing. However, to be able to read English well, you need to know a lot more than 2000 words — about ten times that many, in fact. You won’t learn all these words without trying, even if you spend a lot of time taking English courses and talking to English speakers. Learning the most basic words in English, or any other language, is easy because these words are used so often. ‘Second-level words’ — words that are not necessary for basic communication, but which are necessary for reading — can only be learned by the hard work of studying. But what sort of studying is most effective and most enjoyable? One method is to take the direct approach and learn words ‘out of context’ — by studying word lists, doing vocabulary ‘exercises,’ or even by reading through a learners’ dictionary. There are plenty of textbooks around to help you with this job and you may find English courses that concentrate on this sort of vocabulary building. It’s also possible to take a more ‘natural’ approach and try to build up your vocabulary by reading English books, newspapers, and magazines — looking up words in a dictionary as you go along and taking notes. Both the direct and the indirect approach can work, but both have serious disadvantages. Most people find studying word lists and reading dictionaries quite boring, and a boring method of studying is likely to be ineffective. In addition, even if you’re not bored, you may find it hard to remember the words you try to learn in this way. It seems that words, and other things, stay in our minds better if we see them for the first time while we’re doing something interesting — like reading an enjoyable story or article. The disadvantage of the natural approach is that for intermediate learners — ones who are trying to build their vocabulary up to the 20,000-word level — the most readily available texts tend to be far too difficult and, therefore, they are ineffiicent learning tools. Books, even if they are quite easy to understand, tend to be much too long for someone who is reading slowly while using a dictionary and taking notes. Magazine and newspaper articles, on the other hand, almost always contain a lot of language that is unnecessarily difficult because it is idiomatic or metaphorical or because it includes unusual words that are not really needed. This slows down learners and also makes the experience of reading less interesting and therefore less effective. The best method of vocabulary building is one that combines the advantages of both approaches while avoiding the disadvantages. One way to do this is to learn vocabulary in context, through reading, but with texts that have been specially written for vocabulary building. This makes for natural, efficient, and enjoyable studying. Finding this kind of reading material can be difficult, unfortunately. The reading passages in ESL texts can be a good source, but they're often few in number and very short. Moreover, the readings in books for beginners' are often quite uninteresting and the ones in books for more advanced students are often about quite difficult 'academic' ideas. To succeed with this method of vocabulary enlargement, you need long and interesting texts. The best sources are probably 'simplified' versions of famous works of English literature written specially for learners. Books of this kind are not used as often in ESL courses now as they were in the past, but, if you're taking an English course, your teacher may able to lend you some, and you should certainly be able to find some in your library. If you go to a library or bookstore to look for useful reading material, you should also look at children's and teenagers' books. They are written for readers who, unlike you, have English as their first language; but like you, they still have to learn more words before they can read 'grown-up' material easily.