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I really don’t know how to say this any other way. My dog decided to talk to me the other night and he had a lot to say. It initially played like any other night really. Once again, I was tossing and turning, in and out of sleep. I was half awake, mulling over my job situation: I want to make money writing but I need an income more. Then the most bizarre thing happened. “Hey human Bob! This is your best friend speaking! Wake up!” Who the hell was that? It was a deep, low voice; strong and certain with a hint of a bourbon induced slur. Sounded like Dean Martin actually. I immediately sat up. It was pitch black. The radio clock blurred 3:53 in a dull crimson light. All I could make out was the shadowy outline of Parker, my trusty beagle, sitting upright at my feet. “Hey boy, did you hear that?” I whispered instinctively. “Someone’s in the house.” My vision was starting to warm up to the darkness. Parker just stared back at me, his head tilted, his long ears hanging to the side of his head like hand towels on a wall. He turned his head to the bedroom doorway, lifted his nose to the night and sniffed. He turned back to face me. “Don’t think so.” I swore Parker spoke but it couldn’t be. I mean his hound drawn lips seemed to move to the words I heard but that was impossible. “Who’s there?” I yelled into the night. “Whoever it is, I am warning you that I am at this moment retrieving my loaded double-barrel twelve gauge from under the bed. I will shoot you. So leave now and I want to hear the door slam behind you.” I made some dumb noises in a lame attempt to fool the intruder into believing what I had just proclaimed. I took the ruse to the next level. “Okay. I’m fully armed and about to call 911 from my fully powered cell phone. Oh yeah, strong signal, four bars. Oh yeah, this is going to be a very clear 911 call.” “You’re breaking me up. Put the phone down human Bob.” It was Parker talking. I was certain of it. Nah, it had to be a sick trick. “Okay, good one Steve. You wired up the dog with a little speaker. Very funny.” My brother Steve was known to go to great lengths to pull off pranks. But I was pretty sure he was at his apartment in the city, sixty miles away, God knows doing what, and at 48 years old, unlikely to suddenly bother me with a prank—it had been 25 years since his last one. But the mind scrambles to the most implausible scenarios when so duly challenged. “Don’t think so. Nope it’s me, Parker,” the dog mumbled. I was positive he spoke again. By now I was sitting straight up, leaning towards him. He just sat there and looked at me with those big dark eyes. His poker face was on. “Parker? Are you talking to me?” “Well I’m not talking to myself.” I leaned back against the headboard. He yawned. “This can’t be. I’ve got to stop watching Animal Planet.” “Listen, I’ve got something to say and I’m not sure how long this talking stuff is going to work so …” “You are talking!” I interrupted incredulously. “Should you want I bow wow?” “Holy cow! Parker you are talking.” “Yup. But I’m not sure for how long. So can I say a few things before …” “I can’t believe this.” “Yeah I know. Either can I but if you don’t mind.” I looked at him with a giant smile plastered across my face. Parker can talk. The dog was talking. Who was I kidding? It had to be a prank. He continued. “I’ve been listening to a lot of that talk radio and that C-SPAN channel you watch while you write. I’m here to tell ya I don’t like what I’m hearing.” “You’re kidding me right?” “Afraid not.” Oh this was good. I was really hallucinating. Talk-shmalk, I had a few nagging questions of my own. “Hey, can I ask you something before you get to your stuff?” “Make it quick. I haven’t got all night.” “You like smell things a hundred times more than we do, right?” “Four hundred.” “Okay, four hundred. Wow! Then I really wonder about this.” “Yeah I know. Why do we like to sniff every morsel of excrement or yellow patch of urine we encounter on our walks?” “Now that you bring it up, yeah, why? It must smell like the inside of Dick Cheney’s or Ted Kennedy’s septic tank? And you know how much crap they’re filled with.” “That was a funny one human Bob. But it isn’t like what you smell. We pick up a lot more notes. It’s a broader pallet if you will. We don’t smell stink. We smell identity, mood, and illness. For instance, you know that crazy cairn terrier down the street?” “Yeah.” “She has stomach cancer and her humans don’t have a clue.” “You are kidding me?” “She probably has less than six months if they don’t get her to a vet soon.” He paused to lick his right front paw. “Yeah, and another thing. Don’t take me out at nights for awhile.” “Why?” “Cause there is a rabid possum living under the porch. That’s why.” “You know this from the smell of possum poop?” “Excrement.” “Whatever.” “Yup.” Parker yawned as if bored. “So is that it? Can I say what I need to say?” “Well there is that thing you do with that licking your, you know, your …” “Penis?” “Well, yeah.” “Jealous are we?” “Well, it’s just that …” “It’s all about keeping clean. Nothing pleasurable if that’s what you’re driving at. Nothing like what you do with your hand. By the way, I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t pet me afterwards. Nope, no pleasure; it’s all business. You made sure of that when you had me “fixed”, remember. Thank you very much.” “Oh yeah, sorry about that. I had no idea you knew any different.” “No idea my butt. I’ll ‘no idea’ ya.” He paused again to lick his right paw again and then continued. “But I don’t hold it against you. We don’t hold grudges. Heck, if we did, we would have mauled most humans dead by now. Which brings me to why I am talking to you.” “No grudges. Really? I mean that “fixing” stuff is pretty serious. That’s pretty good if that doesn’t bother you.” “You done? Can I get to my concern?” “Sure. Sorry. Go ahead.” “How can humans be so smart supposedly, while they single handedly are destroying the Earth?” “You mean global warming?” “It’s more than that. It’s the air. It’s the water. It’s the dirt. It’s the forests. It’s the killing. It’s the anger. It’s the hate. It’s the grudges. It’s the fear. It’s everything.” “Oh come on. You’re being a little dramatic.” “We don’t know dramatic.” “Well give me examples of what you mean.” “First of all, the air is filled with danger. Dogs, cats, birds, animals of all kinds can smell it. It is our biggest topic when we get together.” “I don’t smell a thing.” “Yeah, that’s part of the problem. And you can’t taste the troubled water either.” “Scientists don’t seem to be complaining. So I should be listening to a dog?” “We have no agenda. Dogs call it as they smell it.” “ ‘call it as they smell it’; I’m suppose to just accept that?” “Yeah, there is a lot you should just accept.” “Oh yeah, like what else?” “Well, and here is what I think is the crux of the problem, you keep choosing the wrong alpha humans.” “What?” “You’ve got this alpha thing all wrong. Just because animals order their packs based on physical size and strength doesn’t make it so for humans. We do it because we are simple. You do it because you are thoughtless. That’s what we, and I think it is fair to say I am speaking for all animals, don’t get. Humans are able to think things through. But they never do. Well, that’s not completely true; some have but they are mocked or marginalized. An alpha dog barks and gets all puffy, like that wacky shepherd Sarge from around the block. The worst he can do is break out of his electronic fence and charge one of us. But you humans take it up a notch.” “Can you give me a for instance?” “God there are so many. Let me see. Okay, you’ve elected a president who pounds his chest and walks around like a gorilla with its arms all out to the side, all tough and all, carrying on with ‘bring it on’. When he jumps the fence, he brings tanks and bombs and humans loaded down in weapons and in body armor. Meanwhile, you have alpha males all over the place, flexing their muscle in their packs, threatening to obtain nuclear weapons, the great equalizer, giving the president one excuse after another to hop the fence. It’s nuts. And I for one am telling you, you’ve got it all wrong.” “Well, I don’t know what to say.” “You don’t need to say anything. Just start picking the right alpha humans; humans whose visions see beyond fighting, whose hearts hold no grudges, whose thoughts and reasons are not the products of testosterone, whose collective knowledge is rooted in the concept that true peace is never the consequence of war but the outcome of constant learning, negotiating and adjusting.” “This is what you want to tell me? Nothin’ for nothin’ but it’s a little heavy for a little chat with a dog at 3:30 in the morning.” “In a nut shell, yeah.” It was hard to accept this from my beagle. I mean, he’s a dog; a sleeping, eating, sniffing, crapping dog. I was chalking this whole episode up to stress. I was apparently snapping. “That’s it. I’m pretty much done. Just one last thing while I have the chance.” “What? World hunger? String theory?” I asked sarcastically. “You get the right alpha humans and the world hunger thing will take care of itself, smart ass. As far as string theory, who do you think I am, Hawking? I’m just a dog. No it’s more pedestrian than that, something I think you can manage.” “Then what, already?” I asked impatiently. “You know that thing you do occasionally where you empty the dish washer in the buff.” “Ummm … yeah I guess.” “Put some clothes on. It’s disturbing. I’m beggin’ ya, please!” “All right, but only if you lick your privates in private.” “I’ll see what I can do. No promises.” “So this is it? No more talking? You know we could make a fortune on Letterman with his stupid pet tricks.” “It’ll never happen. You see, this is a one time deal. Not sure why or how this is happening. Maybe that God guy is involved somehow. All I know is that when it is done, it is …” He abruptly stopped talking. “Parker?” Not a grunt. He yawned and as he did he stretched his front legs out and spread across the foot of the bed, his ears resting flat on the blanket. “Parker … are you done? Is that it?” He slowly closed his eyes and floated off to sleep. “Parker … just like that?” He began to twitch; in hot pursuit of a fox I imagined. “Holy smokes. I must be dreaming myself.” I curled back down under the safety of my covers, scratched my butt and thought about the conversation I had just had with Parker or myself or both. I sniffed the air. It smelled fine to me. What the heck was he talking about, ‘danger in the air’? It had to be a dream. As I drifted off to sleep, I thought about getting a real job real soon, apparently this writing stuff was getting the best of me. I also made a point to remember to talk to the owners of that crazy cairn terrier. I thought it was the least I could do. 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Men all over the world suffer from premature ejaculation. There are a number of treatments available but how effective are they? To understand better how these work the treatments have been explained below. 1. Distraction during sex This is the most common treatment practised by a lot of men. The idea is to delay orgasm by distracting yourself. The methods of distraction can be to think some unpleasant thought during sex. Some men also distract themselves by pinching themselves or asking their partner to pinch them during sex. Another method is to bite the inside of the cheek during sex. Ouch, that must hurt. 2. Masturbation. It is said that masturbation before sex will delay orgasm. It is all right to do so as long as you don’t make a habit of it and start to rely on this method every time before sex. Usually the anxiety of your performance causes premature ejaculation. So if you rely on masturbation as a way to deal with premature ejaculation then you will only be laying stress on your problem. 3. Sprays/ lotions/ Numbing Creams The market is flooded with such products. The application of these creams/ lotions/ sprays on the penis will numb the penis and thud delay orgasm. But tell me, what is the use of using these creams and lotions if you are so numb that you can’t feel and enjoy sex? 4.Controlling your muscles. The idea here is to strengthen the muscles by doing pelvic floor exercises. These exercises help to delay orgasm. To read complete article go here.... vigrx hoax plastic surgery penile enlargment enlargement free penis pills sample penis elargement excercises enlargement manhattan pnis penis elargement program does penis elargement work do pnis enlargement pills really work free penis enlarement

VIAGRA What is Viagra? Viagra is an anti-impotence drug manufactured by Pfizer with an active ingredient sildenafile citrate for treatment of male impotence. Sildenafile citrate relaxes the muscles and increases the blood flow to particular areas of the body. The intake of Viagra increases the ability to achieve and sustain erection on being sexually stimulated. Men taking Viagra have reported an amplified sex drive, increased stamina, and quicker recharge. Viagra works together with sexual stimulation to help achieve maximum sexual satisfaction. However, Viagra does not guarantee protection from getting sexually transmitted diseases, including HIV and Hepatitis. How Viagra works? Viagra enables many men with ED to respond to sexual stimulation. When a man is sexually aroused, the arteries in the penis relax and widen, allowing more blood to flow into the penis. As the arteries in the penis expand and harden, the veins that normally carry blood away from the penis become compressed, restricting the blood flow out of the penis. With more blood flowing in and less flowing out, the penis enlarges, resulting in an erection. It is to be noted that Viagra is not a hormone or aphrodisiac, it works only when a man is sexually stimulated. Viagra Dosage Viagra is available in the form of tablet and is meant to be taken orally. Ideally it is to be taken almost an hour before the sexual activity. However, Viagra can be taken anytime from 4 hours to 30 minutes before sexual activity. It takes 30 – 45 minutes for showing Viagra’s effect and this effect lasts for almost four hours. If you take Viagra after a high-fat meal (such as fish & chips, cheeseburger or French fries), it may take a little longer to start working. Viagra should not be taken more than once a day unless prescribed by your doctor. Warnings/Precautions It is always advisable to consult physician before starting the intake of Viagra. In case you have the history of an heart attack, stroke, or life-threatening irregular heartbeats within the last six months; or have heart failure in the past; coronary artery disease; angina; high or low blood pressure; liver problems; kidney problems; blood problems, including sickle cell anemia or leukemia; a bleeding disorder; stomach ulcer; retinitis pigmentosa (an inherited condition of the eye); physical deformity of the penis such as Peyronie's disease; or a condition that could lead to prolonged and painful erections, such as a tumor of the bone marrow, sickle cell anemia, or leukemia; or you are taking any other medicine containing nitrates your blood pressure could suddenly drop to an unsafe level and can risk your life. All these medical conditions and also allergy to sildenafile or any of its ingredients can lead to disastrous results. So it is always advisable to consult your doctor for adjusting the dosages after monitoring the treatments listed above. Viagra is not approved or recommended for use in women. Therefore, women should not take Viagra under any circumstances. It also not recommended for men older than 65 years unless they tolerate it in small doses for those who are sensitive to the effects of Viagra. Missed Dose Viagra can be taken as and when needed and there is no concept of missed dosage. Possible Side Effects of Viagra Every medicine has some or the other side effect and so does Viagra. It depends on individual to individual and is usually mild to moderate and don't last longer than a few hours. Mostly these side effects are evident with high intakes of Viagra. The most common side effects of Viagra are headache, nausea, flushing of the face, and upset stomach. Also there can be some temporary changes in color vision (such as trouble telling the difference between blue and green objects or having a blue color tinge to them), eyes becoming sensitive to light, or blurred vision. But if you become dizzy or nauseated, or have pain, numbness, or tingling in your chest, arms, neck, or jaw during sexual activity, stop and call your doctor right away. You could be having a serious side effect of Viagra, or if you have sudden vision loss or have any of these signs of allergic reactions like hives; difficulty breathing; swelling of your face, lips, tongue, or throat seek emergency medical help immediately. It is also advisable to stop using Viagra and call your doctor immediately if you have any of these serious problems like - chest pain or heavy feeling, pain spreading to the arm or shoulder, nausea, sweating, general ill feeling; irregular heartbeat; swelling in your hands, ankles, or feet; shortness of breath and vision changes. In rare instances, men have reported an erection that lasts many hours. But if this is the case then you should call a doctor immediately if an erection lasts more than 4 hours. If not treated right away, permanent damage to your penis could occur. Heart attack, stroke, irregular heartbeats, and death have been reported rarely in men taking Viagra. Most, but not all, of these men had heart problems before taking this medicine. It is not possible to determine whether these events were directly related to Viagra. best enlargement exercise pennis top penis enlargment pills guide to penis enhancement free exercise tip for penis enhancement penis enlarement surgeries penis enlargment fact buy vig rx penile enlargment surgery free penis enlarement

All methods of contraception are used to prevent pregnancy, but condoms have the added advantage of providing protection against infection and the spread of sexually transmitted diseases (STDs). How effective are condoms at doing these two things? Are they really as effective as other contraceptive methods at preventing pregnancy? And since one of the most common reasons for using a condom is to protect against infection, are they really an effective barrier against being infected by STDs? In this article we look at some of these questions. Does using a condom prevent pregnancy? Condoms are an extremely effective means of preventing pregnancy. Of course, no method of contraception is 100% effective because there will always be instances of incorrect or inconsistent use. This is as true of "the pill" or any other form of contraception as it is of condoms. However clinical studies have shown that high quality condoms, when used consistently and correctly, provide an excellent barrier against pregnancy. These trials have shown that correct and consistent use of condoms can have between 95% and 98% contraceptive efficacy rate. How often do condoms fail? The main reason that condoms "fail" to prevent pregnancy or infection is not because the condom itself has "failed", but because of incorrect of inconsistent use. Latex condoms can be weakened by oil-based lubricants like petroleum jelly. They can also be weakened by exposure to sunlight or by age. Sometimes they are torn by teeth or fingernails. But putting these incorrect uses aside, condoms almost never "fail". How often do condoms break or slip off? In the United States, most studies of breakage caused by fault in the condom itself have shown breakage rate is less than 2 condoms out of every 100 condoms. Studies also indicate that condoms slip off the penis in about 1-5% of acts of vaginal intercourse and slip down (but not off) about 3-13% of the time. Again, these rates are influenced by the care one takes when using a condom. Are condoms effective at preventing infection from HIV or STDs? Studies have shown that if a latex condom is used correctly and consistently (every time you have sex), they are a highly effective barrier against infection. This has been demonstrated most clearly by studies of "discordant" couples in Europe. A "discordant" couple is one in which one partner in infected with HIV and the other one is not. In a study of 123 couples in which condoms were used consistently, none of the infected partners became infected. Do thinner condoms give less protection against pregnancy and STDs? Thinner condoms are equally effective as a protection against both pregnancy and infection by STDs. However they may be more easily damaged by fingernails, teeth, jewelry and other incorrect uses, so extra care should be taken when using a thinner condom. Are all condoms thoroughly tested before being sold? All brand name condoms are subjected to rigorous quality control tests at every stage of the manufacturing process. In the US, each condom is electronically tested for holes and defects. Samples are taken from each lot and visually examined using a water leak test. In this test the samples are filled with 300 ml of water and suspended for 3 minutes. Samples from each lot are also subjected to an Air Inflation Test. This involves filling the test condoms with air until they reach the bursting point. They typically will hold about 40 liters of air -- the equivalent of 9 gallons of water! Other samples are checked for size and thickness, some are tested to destruction for physical strength, and still others are artificially aged by applying high temperatures to ensure that they will retain their quality well beyond their 5 year product life. In all regards, condoms have been shown to be an effective way to prevent pregnancy as well as being a highly effective way of guarding oneself against HIV or STD infection. penis enhancement doctor pennis enlargement surgeries enhancement manhattan penis surgeon penis enargement cream erection penis pills size vimax pennis enlargement program easy enlagement free penis surgery way penis enargement patch free penis enlarement

The advances in science over the past century have been breath-taking. We’ve seen man stroll casually on the moon, watched in awe as scientists cloned and brought a sheep to life using nothing more than a few strands of microscopic DNA and we witnessed some stunning improvements in the fields of medicine and care – for example, Viagra to some has been the discovery of a lifetime. Now, it seems, the latest scientifically backed research actually allows a couple to safely and naturally choose the gender of their baby with up to 98% accuracy. The implications of this research are huge and most couples whether they admit it or not would probably prefer one gender of child over the other. This is not at all a bad thing and there are several reasons for this. Perhaps a family with 3 little boys would like to “complete” their family with a lovely baby girl. Until now it has always been wishful thinking and fate has been the ultimate decider – but today, every couple who wish to can choose the gender of their child with a 98% chance of getting the gender of child they would like – and the best thing is that it is completely safe, natural and free. So what are these factors? Firstly, the diet of the female in particular during and around conception plays a big role in determining the gender of your child. This is because what foodstuffs the woman eats at this time has a big impact on her tract (vagina, ovaries, cervix and fallopian tube) which in turn goes a long way in determining whether she will give birth to a baby boy or girl. There is a comprehensive list of foods that should be consumed and avoid if you want a baby girl, and another list if you wish to conceive a boy. Another determining factor is the role of sex between the couple. It may seem unlikely, but both penis size and the sexual position during conception will both have a huge impact on whether your baby will be a boy or girl. This is to do with the resilience of the male and female sperms and how deeply they are deposited within the tract. Some sexual positions facilitate deeper penetration than others which explains the role of intercourse in gender selection. The timing of sex is also crucial in determining the gender of your child – in relation to ovulation. Also important is the female orgasm – whether the woman orgasms or not during conception has a significant say towards deciding the gender of the baby. This is because during orgasm certain chemicals are released into the woman’s tract which induce the right conditions for one particular gender of child to be created over the other. Even male and female masturbation plays a role in determining the baby’s gender. Finally, there are also a number of random factors that can be altered to help create one gender of child over the other – for example certain activities the man does in the hours prior to having intercourse can actually almost eliminate the couples chances of having a baby boy. I really hope you have found this article useful. The most amazing thing about it all is that the decision of having a baby girl or boy is actually largely in our own hands. Almost all the determining factors are things that we can choose to change, in order to favour having one gender of child over the other – to a 98% success rate. If you would like to find out much more including a tip sheet on exactly what you can do to conceive either a baby boy or girl then the below site will show you how: http://www.global-ebooks.com/childindex.htm I wish you every success! G. Eboks